My name is XXX. I am a technology addict. This is my story of how venturing into the digital desert brought back balance into my life.
I have worked in the technology industry for most of the past three decades. Right from studying engineering in Bangalore and the US as the Internet revolution was happening in early nineties, working at companies like Intel in California before coming back to Bangalore to found one of India’s first web hosting companies in Bangalore to riding the boom and bust of the dot com era, I have grown along with the technology industry and India – keeping pace with technology along the way: starting from dial-up modems to access the web, the first web browsers- Netscape, pagers, mobiles and now the always on smartphones. Technology has been an integral part of my life.
Somewhere along this journey, over the past couple of years in particular, I have become addicted to tech. In particular to social media apps- Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter. These apps were installed on my smartphone and the notifications would always cause me to check my phone, several times even a minute and many times even while driving or walking. This caused concern in my family and close friends. I always justified the use of this media to myself and others, by saying that I am using this media not just for myself, but also for Catholic evangelization activities that I felt God was calling me for.
Over time, my behaviour in using tech was starting to be mirrored by my kids. And this had an impact on me, as I had to change if I did not want them to become like me.
For Catholics, Lent is a period of giving up one’s likes and subjecting to a personal transformation modelled on Jesus Christ’s experience in the desert for 40 days. The emphasis is on prayer, fasting and almsgiving. Every year during Lent, I was following the practise of giving up non veg and the other good things I liked. I was influenced for the first time this Lent to undergo a Digital Facebook Fast. An article by my friend, Fr Joshan Rodrigues on the Digital Desert experience in Lent also influenced my thought. Before staring the Facebook Fast, I was conflicted – do I announce to my friends or not? Does this go against the Catholic teachings in the Bible on Fasting – you know that one that goes…do not let anyone know you when fast. I consulted Fr Joshan who advised that it is okay if I let my friends know that I am not FB for Lent, and I can give an alternate email ID or phone number which I could be contacted on in case of emergency. I followed this advice.
Today almost at the end of Lent, I am documenting my experiences here. The first step I did was to uninstall FB from my mobile and logout from FB on my computer. The first few days were hard as the habit of checking FB several times a day need to die down. Also, FB keeps notifying one through mail at certain intervals, that you have missed so many messages or notifications etc. All these are digital temptations to go back to FB! After some time, I got used to this and in fact started noticing that I had better concentration span and time to do more things like prayer, meditation and work on new projects.
Though it was not in my original plan, during this period, I have also disengaged for the most part from WhatsApp and Twitter. A complete exit from WhatsApp was not possible for me, since I use WhatsApp to communicate with other collaborators in my catholic social media ministry activities as well as with my kids teachers and their class groups etc. I worked around this by having WhatsApp installed on a separate phone that I do not carry with me during the day. Also, exited unnecessary groups and those that I could not, restrict checking to once a day. I am also relying on email more and more for communications, as it helps one from making the invariable mistakes that instantaneous WhatsApp communications have as they rely on one’s emotions at that particular moment in time. We also took a decision to move away from WhatsApp as a primary delivery mechanism for our Indian Catholic content site.
All these measures have liberated me and I feel like a new person at the end of almost 40 days of this digital fast . But I was also puzzling why some people like me cannot use social media in moderation. I was looking at several studies on the Net and also interacted with the SHUT Clinic of NIMHANS, which is India’s first center for tech addictions. Here is what they say: Some of us can tend to get addicted quickly to the shots of dopamine that a FB like or WhatsApp notification brings, and the technology companies capitalise on this aspect. It is similar to the reason why some can drink alcohol in moderation while others can’t. It is important to reflect and make an honest assessment what type of person one is, with regards to use of technology. I have become aware of this aspect and I found telling my family and close friends that I have a tendency to become addicted to technology, helps them keep me in check. I also found surrendering this to God, so that I may use Social Media only for His Will and Purpose in my Life Mission very helpful.
Anyway, with all these Digital changes in my life, I feel I have become calmer, more attentive and pay more attention to the family and at work. Technology is our slave to help us lead better lives and not the other way round. At home, we have greatly reduced the use of tech as a result of my experiences. Wifi is off every night and no use of mobile phones at the dining tables, restricting the kids access to data, and only given on a need basis. These are some of the changes made, and it is a work in progress. Our conversations and interactions as a family are better and more engaged now.
With the Grace of God and your prayers too, I shall try and maintain a moderate path in my life going forward beyond Easter, regarding the use of technology. I hope that by sharing this journey of mine through the digital desert, it could help you if anyone is struggling with technology addiction, or even if you simply want a digital break. You can consider taking up a digital detox or digital fast for sometime. This will help put in perspective, as it has for me, that technology is meant to be our slave and not our master.
In early February this year, our Holy Father Pope Francis told a group of consecrated men and women that technology should never have a higher priority that time spent with God and others. Really profound words that ring true and let us all put into practise.
Back to the digital world now for me, but with moderation!