Paul Suski –
This Feast of Mary, Queen of Poland, observed on May 3 and a national holiday in that nation, is closely tied to the vows made by King John Casimir in 1656. May is the month Catholics have traditionally dedicated to the Blessed Virgin Mary; with the arrival of beautiful spring weather, pilgrim traffic to Jasna Góra also increases.
My reflections focus on the meaning and significance of motherhood as a special vocation of every woman, whether physical or spiritual.
Mary: A Guiding Light for All
The Virgin Mary is the ultimate role model for mothers. She is the mother of all mothers par excellence. Mary portrays traits of holiness, piety, and humbleness. She has many noble qualities, which are very much needed for our women and mothers today.
Thus, following the example of the Virgin Mary, the modern woman should learn the virtue of self-denial and how to embrace her own life’s vocation. Here, a young girl from Nazareth offered her fiat to God, consenting to the fulfillment of His will. “Let it be done to me according to your word” (Lk 1:31,38). Although, from a human perspective, consenting to the Divine Will upended her youthful, maidenly plans, it was through her womb that the Savior entered the world.
During his first pilgrimage to his Homeland, at Jasna Góra, on June 6, 1979, Saint John Paul II said: “Motherhood must be treated in work policy and economy as a great end and a great task in itself. For with it is connected the mother’s work in giving birth, feeding, and rearing, and no one can take her place. Nothing can take the place of the heart of a mother always present and always waiting in the home. True respect for work brings with it due esteem for motherhood. It cannot be otherwise. The moral health of the whole of society depends on that.”
God’s Eternal Plan
The Creator assigned the first man a specific task. (Gen. 1:28): “Be fertile and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it.” By virtue of these words, every woman is called to the vocation of motherhood, which may be lived out in either the physical or spiritual dimension. Marriage is the natural setting for the gift of fertility, where spouses cooperate to bring forth new life. A divine calling is no mere suggestion to be weighed by human judgment. The vocational accounts preserved in the Hebrew Bible point unmistakably to the authoritative and irrevocable character of the Lord’s word. To depart from it may incur grave consequences : Adam and Eve (Genesis 3:1–24), Saul (1 Samuel 15:22–23, 26–28), Jonah (Jonah 1:3–4, 11–17).
“Being in the image of God the human individual possesses the dignity of a person, who is not just something, but someone. He is capable of self-knowledge, of self-possession and of freely giving himself and entering into communion with other persons. and he is called by grace to a covenant with his Creator, to offer him a response of faith and love that no other creature can give in his stead.” (CCC 357)
(Ps. 127:3) “Behold, children are a gift from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.” In the Old Testament, having offspring was regarded as the greatest blessing from God, while infertility was seen as a cause of deep sorrow and even social disgrace. The dignity of the biblical woman derived primarily from her vocation to motherhood, which she inherited from Eve (Gen 3:20). All these women longed for motherhood, often despite advanced age, like Sarah, who in desperation resorted to a stratagem (Gen 16:1), or Hannah, who persisted in praying in the temple of the Lord (1 Sam. 1:9–13). Lot’s daughter, seeing no prospect of motherhood, even resorted to incest (Gen 19:30–38). Rebekah, Isaac’s wife, was barren; after many years of prayerful struggle, she conceived and gave birth to twins, Esau and Jacob (Gen 25:21). Finally, the sun of God’s power and grace shone in the tents of Isaac. For biblical women, every birth, despite the pain and suffering, always brought indescribable joy, which is often expressed in the names of their firstborn sons (Gen 21:6; 30:24).
The Venerable Archbishop Fulton Sheen, widely known for his preaching, particularly on television and radio, saw motherhood as God’s most privileged way to cooperate in the universal priesthood of all believers: Motherhood then becomes a kind of priesthood. She brings God to man by preparing the flesh in which the soul will be implanted; she brings man to God in offering the child back again to the Creator … she is nature’s constant challenge to death, the bearer of cosmic plentitude, the herald of eternal realities, God’s great co-operator.
God’s Wisdom Hidden in the Female Body
Already in the mother’s womb, we are given a gender: woman or man. Our body and psyche, through the stages of growth and adolescence, clearly signal who we are and to what we are called. It must be remembered that a woman is not born a mother but becomes one through a series of transformations: physical, psychological, social, emotional, and hormonal. Reaching sexual maturity alone is not enough; personal maturity is also required. To become a mother is to move from “I” to “you;” from that moment on, I no longer live for myself but for this other person in whom Jesus dwells. And all this is possible through cooperation with God’s grace, which makes selfless love possible.
Girls develop different skills and interests from the outset. Their brains develop in a more symmetrical way, with both hemispheres closely connected, which later enables them to carry out several activities at once. This ability often proves especially helpful when a woman is surrounded by four to seven children. Girls maintain eye contact more easily from infancy. They enjoy looking at faces and learning to read emotions from them, and can therefore more quickly tell, for example, whether a parent is angry or joyful. They are also especially adept at observing behaviour and imitating it, for instance by caring for a baby doll or playing house. Their behaviour and play are calmer and gentler because their bodies produce more serotonin. Girls’ hands are more dexterous, which makes them drawn to activities that require precision, such as colouring or threading beads. They are attentive listeners. Much more than boys, they prefer to listen to the human voice. They also like to speak. Their speech centre has a significant advantage over other centres, which is why girls begin speaking earlier. Before they learn to speak, they acquire the ability to understand the speech of others, and they do so much faster than boys.
Any limitation of a woman’s reproductive capacity and any separation of fertility from sexuality, for example: in vitro procedures, constitute an attack on her identity. The temporary or permanent sterilization of a woman causes a lasting mutilation of her nature, which is ordered toward motherhood, and it must be said plainly that it is a grave sin which, in the case of Catholics, should be confessed in the sacrament of confession. As I alluded in the Contraception and Contrition: A Christian Perspective, published in 2024.
(Prov. 16:33) Every seemingly “chance” event—a flat tire, running into a long-lost friend, a roll of the dice, the luck of the draw, and others—has a place in God’s plan, even if we are unaware of His ultimate purposes. Even more so, the entire complex physiology of woman is not, and cannot be, the product of blind chance, but rather the handiwork of God’s eternal wisdom.
Nevertheless, radical feminism continues to propagate the lie that human nature can be changed – which it cannot as all life and history confirms always and everywhere.
For anti-natalists, procreating is unethical because life is so riddled with hardship that it is unjust to inflict it upon another human being; that is a form demonic empathy. There is also the ecological argument human existence is inherently harmful to the planet and its ecosystems.
Home: The Headwaters of Mission
“For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Mat 16:25)
Sacrifice is innately etched into the tapestry of motherhood. The offering of one’s own body so that another may dwell within it; the renunciation of personal plans and one’s former way of life; and thereafter, sleepless nights, constant solicitude, and a perpetual readiness to hasten to another’s aid whenever necessity arises—kneeling at midnight, with a rosary in hand, commending the concerns of her children and husband to God. Motherhood entails a service for which no repayment is expected, for it rests not on lending or exchange, but on the logic of the selfless gift. “God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Cor. 9:7). Ultimately, motherhood provides you with an opportunity to give up the things that you cannot keep on behalf of the people that you cannot lose. They are eternal souls, they are your children, they are your mission field.
Saint Mother Teresa of Calcutta once said, “Love, to be true, to be real – it must hurt, it must cost, it must empty us of self… If you want a happy family, if you want a holy family, give your hearts to love… People who really and truly love each other are the happiest people in the world.”
When a woman’s time is wholly occupied by loving service to those nearest her, one may say she is far from idle and may truly be pleasing to God. Indeed, even a nun who idles away the hours in bed (if such a sister even exists!), reading books for her own sake rather than for God—how can she expect to inherit the Kingdom of God?
Demographic Collapse
From the late 1960s until the mid-1980s, the apartment-block alleys, lawns, and playgrounds of Gdańsk, Poznań, and Warsaw teemed with children at play—at least as far back as the author’s memory reaches. Today, one sees only small groups of children—mostly Ukrainian—while Polish women of reproductive age are more likely to be seen walking one, two, or even three dogs. Regrettably, instead of children’s laughter, one hears the barking of dogs, and in place of a family, a dog now accompanies couples in love. “Two plus fur-baby” (dwa plus psiecko)—as this arrangement is called—is becoming an increasingly common phenomenon.
In some regions of the country, paediatricians are running out of patients, maternity wards are being shuttered, and playgrounds are disappearing from housing estates. Some Polish manufacturers now report more orders for dog strollers than for baby carriages. To add insult to injury, the word “child” triggers more panic in the younger generation than Russian drones or a lack of Wi-Fi access.
The Mayor of Warsaw, Rafał Trzaskowski, instead of promoting pro-family policies, actively supports planting more trees, laying grass over tram tracks, and removing concrete pavements to make room for flowers. It has become commonplace to reduce street capacity in favour of green belts and bike lanes, and to establish Clean Air Zones. “Finally, Warsaw can breathe,” goes the ubiquitous slogan. Out of feigned concern for women, more daycare spots are created. After all, why should a woman sit unproductively at home when the city budget gains nothing from it? On public transport, advertisements encouraging dog adoption appear repeatedly. Naturally, such actions are part of a broader trend well known to residents of cities where leftist ideology took root much earlier: in Perth, Western Australia; Dublin, Ireland; and Portland, Oregon. As a result, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Christians must never bend the knee to climate change ideologies.
Facts and Figures
According to Statistics Poland (GUS), exactly one year ago, the TFR fell to 1.03. This was the lowest level in Poland’s postwar history and one of the lowest in Europe. The grimmest forecasts suggest that by 2060, the population of this country could decrease by as much as nine million.
The “population bomb” that terrified governments in the 1970s has turned into a global population bust. Israel is the only developed, with a fertility rate above replacement—about 2.8 children per woman—serves as a prime example, a nation where religion plays a vital role and where there is a profound sense of patriotism and responsibility for the state.
And Africa is the only continent in which the population is replacing itself. Its TFR is about 3.9. The average number of Australian children born per woman over a lifetime has sunk to the lowest on record—1.5.
Back to Poland. Why are women having so few children?
Gen Z and millennials usually cite a lack of financial stability, housing difficulties, and fear of a diminished standard of living as reasons for their childlessness.
The decline in the TFR has been driven by the weakening of stable unions; in 2023, as many as 8% of couples lived together without being married or in a civil partnership. In 2024, of the 135,000 marriages contracted, only 44% were religious ceremonies.
This year’s CBOS surveys show that among those aged 18 to 29, only 12% are married, while nearly 45% are not in any relationship at all—meaning they have neither a partner nor any desire to date.
Who is behind this? The same one who hates unborn children—the Devil, the original source of all evil and suffering on earth. For him it is obvious: the fewer children are in a Catholic country, the fewer potential candidates for the priesthood, and the fewer Masses are celebrated.
Where faith flourishes, life blossoms.
There is an extraordinary housing estate in Poland where the fertility rate stands at a staggering 3.5 children per woman and continues to rise—even as the rate falls sharply across the rest of the country. It was built by a group of friends from a Christian student organization in Konstancin-Jeziorna, near Warsaw. The community is split roughly half-and-half between Catholics and Protestants. One resident, Krzysztof Góra, remarked in an interview with the Catholic weekly Gość Niedzielny: “Today, we need a different media message. We are bombarded from all sides with slogans saying it is better not to have children because they are a limitation and a burden; whereas, in reality, they are a gift and a blessing.”
Conclusion
Someone who chooses to have an animal instead of starting traditional family may be compared to a man who, having discovered a vocation to the priesthood, deliberately rejects it for trivial reasons. Consequently, this perilous situation may lead to the loss of eternal life and separation from God.
Jesus said to a Servant of God, Polish mystic Leonia Nastal (†1940) “Think how foolish it is to value more the attachment to a dog, a cat or a bird in cage than Divine Love. And yet, there are people so much enmeshed in these sorts of trifles that they skip Mass on Sunday only because they do not want to leave a dog alone.”
A woman who fails to discover her identity becomes a caricature of femininity. This, in turn, leads her—in moments of profound despair—to reject the ultimate gift: motherhood. The lamentable expression “unwanted child” thus becomes the pretext for the killing of the unborn.
On 3 June 1991 in Kielce, Saint John Paul II said:
“The world would turn into a nightmare if spouses facing material hardship were to see in their conceived child nothing but a burden and a threat; or if, conversely, well-off spouses were to see in a child an unnecessary and costly expense. For this would mean that love no longer counts in human life. It would mean that the great dignity of the human person, his true vocation and his ultimate destiny have been entirely forgotten.”
Let these reflections end with the following prayer:
O Lady of Jasna Góra, our Mother and Queen, we fall on our knees before you and with sincere hearts pay all homage due to you as the Mother of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
For more than six centuries, your Holy Image has stood upon Polish soil as the sign of a special covenant with Christ and before it, King John III Sobieski lay prostrate in prayer. Your Holy Image has always shone with a unique light of hope amid our historical trials and tribulations. You were with us, O Mary, during the “Deluge,” during the partitions, and during the occupation under the two totalitarian regimes. When all the lights for Poland went out, your bright light remained, giving us comfort and illuminating our darkness.
We, the sons and daughters of the Polish land, in our Homeland and throughout the diaspora, implore you to instill within us a spirit of true sacrifice and generous self-giving. Help all future parents to receive the priceless gift of their child’s life. Comfort those who have lost that gift through abortion and lead them to inner healing through the Divine Mercy of your Son. Inspire us all with the courage needed to bring our faith into all areas of public, social, and political life, and to raise our voices on behalf of those who have no voice! Help us never to see others as a burden and allow us to walk together in charity along with the rest of humanity, sharing joyfully in our common journey towards our heavenly abode.
We ask this in the name of your Son, Jesus Christ, who is Love and Mercy itself. Amen.
Paul Suski, based in Poland, has a BA in English Language Teaching, an MA in Political Science, three adolescent children, and wears a Carmelite scapular.