Know What to Remember, What to Forget

By Fr. Adolf Washington

A man who saw a farmer mercilessly whip his mule while he ploughed in the hot sun said “Look, its’ not my business to teach you how to plough. But don’t you think it would be kind if you would rather make some sounds like “hoo hoo” or “gee gee” and get the beast to plough instead of mercilessly whipping it?”

The farmer replied “Three years ago this donkey kicked me with his hind legs and ever since we have not been in talking-terms”.

Often we hold grudges for months or years refusing reconciliation or a spirit of forgiveness to prevail. In reality, the hatred and feelings of grudge we carry end up becoming a burden upon ourselves. Life can get miserable with every sight or thought of the persons who hurt us. When you forgive and forget, your friends increase, you have power over your sleep, your appetite, your work, your relationships, you are at peace and even your worship finds meaning.

A man who was told by his doctor he had only a few days to live called in a couple of people who had hurt him saying “I have only a few days to live so I forgive all of you from the bottom of my heart”. Relieved at the man’s spirit of forgiveness, they headed for the door when they heard him say “But look, just in case I survive. I withdraw my forgiveness”.

Mahatma Gandhi in his autobiographical reflections titled ‘All men are brothers’ writes “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong”. Lay theologian and Christian apologist C S Lewis wrote “I think that if God forgives us we must forgive too, otherwise, it is almost like setting up ourselves as a higher tribunal than Him”.

St. Paul in his letter to the Ephesians writes “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, with all malice, be put away from you. Be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another” (Ephesians 4:31-32).

Make life meaningful by remembering what to forget. Forget that which made you sad and remember that which made you glad. Forget the times people failed you and remember the ones that stood by you in difficult times. Forget the troubles you faced, instead remember the many blessings received.